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How to help someone recognize they need help?
Addiction & Recovery | Last Active: Sep 26, 2023 | Replies (14)Comment receiving replies
I am an alcoholic and drug addict. I was clean and sober for over thirty two years. Then I started drinking and doing drugs again at age 50. The reasons don’t really mater. What does matter is my wife and I discussed divorce but I stayed in the house guest room. In three months it ended very, very badly.
It’s been ten years and I’ve not seen my beloved wife and children since. I have also been clean and sober the whole time since. She got away from me and took the kids, she was right to do so! Now I’m trying to fix the mess I made and don’t know if I’ll have enough time.
The best way I can put it is that alcoholism is a virus and the alcoholic is the carrier. The virus poisons everyone that comes in contact with it. My wife knew to get away and to take the kids away before I gave the virus to them. I am grateful to her.
Only the alcoholic can choose to get better. Until I did I was toxic and would have sickened the people I love the most. The best coping tools I know of for loved ones of the alcoholic are therapy and alAnon. AlAnon is free.
Take care of yourself first or you’ll have nothing left for others.
Replies to "I am an alcoholic and drug addict. I was clean and sober for over thirty two..."
Good for u that u r sober again i wish u luckxo I was diagnosed with a genetic heart disease 4 months ago I quit everything and have never felt better it's such a better way of life being clean PS 57 years old here
Thank you for laying your truth out for everyone to see. I too am an addict who’s been sober for 5 years but I don’t take it for granted, every day is another chance to mess up if I don’t setup boundaries and stick with them. Big hugs from one hurting soul to another.
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Thank you for sharing your experience, I am sorry that you 'lost connection' with your family as a result. The sad thing is, my spouse is historically a kind, friendly, outgoing person. I honestly think my letting him know I wished to separate moved him to a place of grieving... but that has since led to a lot of blaming, I am the one who needs help, he does not have a problem and this is all my fault. I am running out of ability to care for him and need to preserve my strength for the kids and I. He's very manipulative, has an answer for everything and constantly leads me to wonder where "I" have gone wrong. I cannot help someone who does not think they need help.