If meds don't help or you suffer side effects, going from therapist to therapist is also not helping, has anyone suggested you try some other route - meditation, exercise, getting outdoors? Our thoughts affect how we feel and how we feel affects our mood and that affects our gut and that affects our sleep that affects our outlook. I was very down several years ago, on my own started meditation and made sure I got out for a walk and sunlight. Learning to use your breath properly to calm your system is powerful. Learning to turn negative thoughts into positive thoughts is powerful. I'm sure you've heard "you are what you think." Try something different instead of going from therapist to therapist and from one med to another that doesn't appear to be helping based on your comments. Change course and see if something different works. And I say all of this with the deepest empathy and sympathy for you all. I've been there.