Hi, @maddiemae. I had ACDF surgery on c5c6 which helped with difficulty walking and regaining bladder control due to myelopathy spinal cord pressure/damage (if I waited any longer, I could have had permanent loss of bladder control and worsening of my ability to walk). I lost a good amount of muscle strength and conditioning. I was dropping things and losing balance and had upper body pain and weakness. I am so de-conditioned now that small tasks are so hard due to weakness and exhaustion. This is now my life at the age of 54! My body feels like it is 84! I used to love to dance and do yoga but basic movements and walking up stairs are so difficult now (I use the railing to pull me up some days). I just lost my job due to large layoff and I am a single parent of a 14 year son and his sole provider (he has some special needs, too). Losing health insurance scares me and not being healthy makes it hard to find work (very limited physically on what I can do). I get so depressed about my limitations and look at my house getting more cluttered and dirty because I have limited strength and energy it’s so very frustrating (coming from a person who liked to be organized and independent). I am scheduled next week for an updated MRI of my lumbar spine and follow up appointment with my surgeon’s PA to see the status of my l4l5 spinal stenosis and see if anything new is showing up that explains the new numbness in my feet when I walk and numbness in my buttocks when I stand. Injections have helped in the past but so painful when you get them. I’m not sure it is good for the lumbar spine to get many injections over a long period as it might compromise the joint so surgery may provide some longer term relief of pressure on the spinal cord/nerves/nerve roots. I’m lying in bed as I type this…do a little, need to lie down, which is on repeat throughout the day. Can never do what I planned or would like to do/accomplish. My depression and exhaustion makes me give up and not care about the things I used to care so much about. What I find is that others around you don’t really understand or empathize what living with chronic pain/weakness/exhaustion/depression is like. It is like a disability but since you aren’t missing limbs or using assistive devices to walk or get around (yet), they do not “get it” and your invisible disability means you are limited in what you can do and need more help. I feel like I have to beg for help or wear a sign that says that I need help and not to assume I am okay because I am not. I used to be on duloxetine 60mg and bupropion 150mg but went off them to see how I felt off them (was on them so long and had gained weight which doesn’t help chronic pain at all). I realize now I need to go back on the medication but the loss of medical coverage at the end of October makes me afraid to go back on them only to not be able to afford them so I can keep taking them (once on them, need to taper off really slowly over time). With my depression and chronic pain where it is now and loss of job, I don’t want to become suicidal and coming off those medications may make things worse. I have no family and feel so alone in my personal struggles that some days, I don’t feel like I can go on. I’m not sure how I can make things any better. I am usually a fighter and one to persevere (raised in a family of abuse and neglect and always for the underdog) but this has really beaten me into the ground where I literally can’t get up.

Yes, warmer temperatures and higher humidity seems to make my nerve pain, pins and needles, burning, and tingling worse. We have had a heat wave here and I need to limit time outdoors in the sun and stay in A/C. Cooler showers help. Swelling seems to put more pressure on nerves.