ABSOLUTELY. Have you read or talked about "secondary losses" yet? For me this struck such a chord. The death of someone we care about is a primary event in our lives but we are losing so much more than just our person. This loss sets in motion dozens of subsequent losses. Examples given were loss of: family structure, financial security, self-confidence, identity, dreams, future and past, ETC. Its that pebble dropped into a pond and the ridiculous ripple affects it has on the water. It was suggested to me that its helpful to identify these personal secondary losses and grieve them also. The following words were provided to get you thinking about the roles that your person filled in your relationship and that was such an eye opener:
Friend--Lover--handyman--gardener--companion--tax preparer--spouse--bill payer--protector--counselor--cook--co-parent--sports partner--comforter.
Then we went on to fill in the list with what our special person provided or enhanced in our life together. One thing that hit me was that my husband really was my biggest fan and loved me so well, so unconditionally. I want THAT again. I want a life partner again. I want love and to be loved again. Finally, i read a book by a woman named Christina Rasmussen, Second Firsts. She speaks of the word "dating" and the discomfort it elicits for so many. But if we think of it as "loving" and that we are going out to find someone to love us, then it softens it a little. I liked that idea. So YES, i too am obsessed by this!