Bi-Rad C4 - 50-95% malignancy.

I received a call from the radiologist’s office requesting I come in a path results. Clinical diagnosis right now is Stage I, grade 2 with ER/PR-positive and HER2-negative with a variance in masses. Basically, I still don’t know if the masses are two primary or not. I see my oncologist and surgeon on 9/5. I have no idea what to expect. I just know I will be so glad to have a plan in place.

I would expect that there will be discussions about your specific cancer, and of course recommendations for a treatment plan. I have found that a second set of ears, a recording cell phone and an ask for printouts to be very helpful. It is hard to find out you have cancer but the shock not happening at the same time as information gathering is helpful, I think. When I got the news, it was quite shocking even though deep down, I think I knew. I pretty much did not hear another word of our meeting. My brain had already raced ahead to what if, and oh no!
Have you thought about a list of questions for your doctor?

I did know deep down, but still a shock. Last Friday was a day of depression for me and could cry at the drop of a hat. My husband and I were meeting friends for dinner. I told him on the way about my day and that I was on the verge of crying at any moment. He asked, “why”. I about lost it as in wanted to burst into tears, but didn’t. At the same time I realize he can’t understand how I’m feeling. My husband is going with me to my appointments a week from tomorrow. I had thought about recording the conversation at the doctor’s office, but not sure if it will be allowed. I have actually started a list of questions, but I’m not even sure what to even ask at this point. I also know the conversation will prompt other questions. I’m not sure we’ll be able to think well enough to even know what to ask at the time.

I feel so fatigued sometimes. Is this normal? Even before I found out I have breast cancer I felt fatigued, but worse now.

Everything you are feeling is more normal than you can know. Being here, on connect, with others who have been there is a very good thing. For sure ask if you can record the conversation, just so you don’t miss anything. If you feel like crying just sit down and have a cry, for me it is better to let it happen because then I get a period of time where I am less likely to start again. The fatigue is normal too, the stress of it takes an enormous amount of energy.
Try not to make yourself crazy with “what if” , easier said than done, I find that confining my worries to certain blocks of time helps. I get a half an hour in the morning and a half an hour at night. Then the rest of the day I can tell myself, “nope, you can think about this later” this allows me to refocus on the task at hand, at least until I have to do it again sometimes 10 minutes later.
Some people do audiobooks, but I find music and physical work to be a better distraction.
What ways do you normally distract yourself from the unpleasant and the waiting?

I’m going to try to take your advice on setting aside certain blocks of time to be concerned about my cancer, or least try to.
I tend to do better when I’m busy with physical work as well, if I can stay on track. I also discovered when I went shopping the other day that retail therapy works wonders for a distraction. 🙂 Thanks for all the good advice!