Morning Lagrange~
Your thread caught my eye. I'm sure it will also resonate with many more who are suffering from the pain of loss.
The love of my life, for over 47 years passed away in 2021. My beloved son also passed in 2017..that's also a loss that never finds peace within my soul.

I totally get what you wrote about our loved ones 'being there' for us in so many ways. As low as my heart can sink, at times..I do also get the rewards of 'them' coming back to me. About a week after my son died..I was driving and all of a sudden he was sitting right next to me and had his hand casually on my shoulder..(I could feel the weight of his hand)...he wasn't 47 and ill..no..he was about 19 and healthy! We shared a few words..as frankly, I was just there to witness this remarkable happening and I didn't want to upset anything with mere words..other than I told him I loved him and would always ..he told me the same..and that he was "ok"...and that he would always look out for me. And then he was gone...poof....I came home and took out a container of family pictures...the first one I turned over was how "Jason" appeared to me in my car that day! Same shirt and pants...standing..looking over the cliff to the ocean with a sweet smile on his face...young and healthy!
We have since had a few conversations....nothing planned..but every once in awhile..I'll hear his voice.."Hi mom" and there he is..in my ethereal head-space, I guess one can call it. I'm a witness to this happening...I hear my soul talking to him..and his answers...all very brief, but enough for me to feel better about not having him in my earth-plane life any longer. I also reached out to him when my husband passed and asked him to take care of my sweet Perry...I heard back..."I've got him".....that's all I've needed to feel more peace in my heart.
None of this is easy, for sure...I never thought about the physical as well as the mental and emotional pain of losing loved ones before. Some days, hours, are worse than others ...but lately..I'm realizing and feeling the presence of lost loves..not only my husband's and son's, but close friends as well. I've never been a lucky person...no lottery has ever picked one number I had picked...but since their passing and being totally alone now...I'm finding that my life is working out better than I could have imagined or thought it could be....in many strange ways that I couldn't tell anyone..fearing they would just call me a nut...but I know me and also know that 'energy' cannot be destroyed.
So in this chaotic and troubled world we all find ourselves in now..I am also allowing goodness and happiness to enter into my broken heart and I am now beginning to 'feel' a healing and resolve. This is giving me a new outlook on what life I have left to live..to find joy and happiness in the gossamer magic of nothing really....just being 'me'...as my loved ones are still around me...I'm so fortunate, indeed.
I wish you the very best on your path...