I totally understand where you’re coming from, and was in the same position myself less than a week ago. The fear is being fueled by your anxiety. Ironically, we come to an online community for support, read these horrific accounts, and our minds convince us “that’s going to be you.” Remember, it’s just the anxiety. There’s always going to be someone out there who’s had a worse experience. Think of how far you’ve come, and what you’ve accomplished. You’re on the path to recovery, and that takes time. Wishing you the best, and some moments of peace today. Remember, it’s just anxiety.