I agree with all the information above and it nicely converges on self-education is crucial for being informed and prepared for discussing prostate cancer. What you also need to bring to the table is something the health team has no insight into it, that being the overall outlook of the life for the patient. Surgery comes with risks of impotence and incontinence, how would either of those effect the quality of life of the patient? What is the life expectancy of the patient, no one enjoys this conversation, but if you are responsibly planning your financials, then there has to be a plan in place. What is the family history of cancer, sometimes this can take multiple requests to get your family to share the specifics. --- Overall, the topic of prostate cancer is where you need to be self-educated and build a great relationship with your health team, but the topic of your own life is something you need to bring to the table. You are going in the right direction, keep going!