To @1k194

Lots of truly excellent advice here! But, Where to start?
I tried to set up this post like a check list for you. Hope it helps!

I suggest you start with:
1. Grammy82's reminder that you are doing so much and you are great!
Keep repeating to yourself what she said.

2. Get help! Try these:
a. your church, your parents' church. Just cold call and ask if they help seniors.
b. your family: aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings.
Tell your siblings that you are maxed out for now, and that they need to step up now.
Try to give other helpers specific tasks at specific times: eg. pick up meds at drug store on Tuesday.
c. your local government, county, state. My county has a "Services for the Aging" department. (Maybe your daughter/husband could Google search this for you.)
d. your parents' health insurance. Are your parents getting every service available?
e. social worker- You might be able to find one through church, county, or insurance. A social worker knows the resources to get you help.
I probably should have put "social worker" first, because they can get you other helpers.
f. Hire help, if you can. Can your parents afford to pay?
Do your parents qualify for any home health aides under medicare or their health insurance?
It's faster to get paid help than to get volunteers.
Hire a cleaner for your house and theirs. Some cleaners will do bathrooms and kitchens for cheaper than whole-house cleaning.
Order groceries on line.
Get stuff delivered.
g. This suggestion is tricky.
Are your parents doing everything that they are able to do? Or are they leaving stuff for you to do? In other words, are they taking you for granted and adding work for you?
Maybe talk to your parents about how the current situation is not sustainable. Maybe they could do the "asking" of other people they know (their siblings who are your aunts and uncles) for help. Maybe they could call medicare, agencies, etc.
Maybe it's time to talk about nursing homes.
What do they need to be more independent of you? Move dishes to a lower shelf? Ask them to think about it, too, and you can help them set it up.

3. Give yourself a lot of slack.
Are you demanding perfection of yourself?
*Focus on the tasks that really matter: the sink has to be sanitary, but the floor doesn't.
*Do the minimum effort and time on a chore. The sink needs to be sanitized, but it doesn't need to shine.
*You need to cook, but it doesn't have to be from scratch.
See if you can get casseroles from church volunteers or "Meals on Wheels" for your parents.

*****
I have been in a similar situation: my own bad, mysterious health and taking care of parents and my own kids and husband. You are in a tough spot. It can be hard to know where to start. I hope this "checklist" post helps.

Good luck! Keep your chin up. : )