saille412, thank you! Indeed, this is where we are. My life dealing with anxiety and depression has taught me the following. Acceptance is the First Step towards Transformation. With this in mind, I declare that your refrain cannot be repeated too much; This is where we are.

“We don’t know too much”

After 15 months of crushing 24/7 fatigue, non-refreshing sleep, debilitating brain fog, and impaired communication abilities (which for me has been diagnosed as “mild cognitive impairment.” Although it doesn’t feel mild at all,) painful pins and needles and body soreness everywhere, I actually don’t know what I'm dealing with except for the common experiences being identified as Long Covid and the fact that my symptoms hit me like a freight train all at once, in the spring of 22. I was never aware of having Covid, I was ridiculously careful, didn’t have any respiratory symptoms, only felt “weird” for a bit and now my I am a different person. This is where I am.

“There is no real set of symptoms that can identify us as having LC”.

Yes, the variety of symptoms is baffling. That said we are now part of a community of people dealing with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Myalgic encephalomyelitis, (ME) commonly known as C.F.S., affects 15 to 30 million people worldwide with many of the same symptoms as LC. There is no known cause or cure, it’s been around for a long time, most doctor’s know nothing about it, with little research or acknowledgement by the medical community. The advocate group MEACTION.NET has taken the LC cause as their own. Everyone dealing with LC should become familiar with them.

We feel alone, we are not alone.

“Western medicine helps. But the allopathic method is to treat the body as individual parts….”

I’ve been to specialists for over a year which has basically ruled lots of stuff out but has given me little understanding as to what I am dealing with. Specialists see things through their own particular lens. I’m officially bored with overworked specialists looking at me blankly telling me they don’t know anything about Chronic Fatigue Syndrome or Long Covid, or worse, telling me it’s all in my head.

I have been using a CPAP, sleep machine for Hypoxia, (not enough oxygen on the tissue level) which I attribute to getting my communication skills back. Although the sleep doctors have not been all that helpful to be honest.

I’ve been diagnosed by a Neurologist with “Mild Cognitive Impairment” after a short cognitive test. I have to wait months for more in depth cognitive testing. I’m hoping these tests will lead me to learning strategies to deal with this messed up brain of mine.

With the help of a friend, I’m looking at a year’s worth of labs and tests, including a brain MRI to understand all of the things that these tests have ruled out.

So here are my “This is where I am” statements.

With the help of deep breathing mindfulness. I am accepting that I am a different person now.

I am repurposing the many things I know about managing my mental health to this new reality.

I accept that I probably will never know exactly how or why all of this is happening to me.

I don’t accept that my life is over. It is different. I am different.

Years ago someone said to me about her mental illness, “When I can accept that when my past dreams for my life will not come true, but life can still be great, that’s when I know I will be ok.”

Again, saille412, a very big Thank You! I hope we connect and keep your brilliant mantra alive.

THIS IS WHERE WE ARE.