Thank you so much for your reply! It does make sense, definitely.

In my case I have two backpacks! OCD only diagnosed at age 50, but manageable, and the neurosis backpack. I am still at a stage that involves (forgive the pun) unpacking which feelings are due to which of these two - they affect each other.

But the metaphor still holds, because they both "don't = me".

If I go out with some nice people and have a drink, a "best possible" me shows up... sociable, empathic, good-humoured, even witty at times.

I don't think that's totally "the real me", but it makes me aware that I include that. However, in that case, presumably SOME of the stones I carry aren't in the backpack either! They are my "natural" faults, I include them too.

Unless... this "real me" we're taking about is the detached, "Zen", observing me that Eckhart Tolle, Alan Watts et al talk about?

So I guess the true challenge is understanding that as a mere human I must love me with MY "natural" faults, but I must also care for myself over the stones that "other people/ life" put in my backpacks.

It reminds me of that saying "... grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

But it's an ongoing process, and I my parents brought me up as their "little boy genius", which nurtured my arrogance and alienation stones. I'm working on those!

Please excuse my ramblings. In summary, yes, I definitely agree with the backpacks analogy. And I'm still trying to figure out who/what is the "I who carry them" part of the analogy!