I can relate a little to your situation. My family, bless them, have not given up on me, and my husband and kids are doing everything possible to help me through chemo. I do think, however, that my MD has given up. I don't think he was ever on board with "let's fight this." He is frank and honest, but not very encouraging, even for things that might deserve a shout-out. (For example, he could say "Good!" when I mention that I've been walking and trying to build strength. But no, he doesn't.) Should you consider switching MDs? I'm not there yet, but I do plan to address this issue with him at our next visit.

What services does your oncology practice and/or cancer center offer? Mine has a full slate of activities and classes for patients and caregivers. Most are still on Zoom, which is unfortunate, but yesterday at the infusion center, we happened to bump into the artist in residence, who kindly offered to come visit during my next chemo session and bring some activities to do. Perhaps your practice or cancer center offers activities you could tap that are more positive and will put you in touch with people who are more positive. Re faith, everyone has a different approach, and I respect that. Perhaps there are some books or web sites that talk about some of the issues you face without belief in the higher power.

This is a difficult diagnosis, and I think we all know that. But we can't go into this process already believing that we're doomed. That's the issue I see: How to remain positive and hopeful? I'd be interested to hear others' ideas as well.

Jump to this post