@grammy82 Thank you, dear soul, once again.

I have read your post a few times now, and it's funny, so far I've misread it - but that may be because my misread (a version of a 'Freudian slip'?) is a clue to my unrewarding efforts: I read your phrasing of "Eventually, at least for me, I realized that I was always looking for someone to make me happy…" INSTEAD AS:
"...I realized I was always looking for someone to MAKE happy..."
[likely, at least, because my poor, loving, lonely and lovely mother never seemed happy, and my sister and I - esp. my sister at times, being a doctor, was made to feel she HAD to make Mom happy, and it generally never was enough].

So, I always want people to BE happy, get along (unlike how I experienced my parents' relationship), to enjoy things, find solace and/or peace in things, to find their own happiness. Yet, I can't seem to find mine: the ONLY thing I can identify that truly makes me happy is dancing - I've taught it, I've taken it, studied it when I was younger - but now I just want to DO it - but, the sinister catch is: it almost always takes TWO - and a dance partner I've never found - at least not for the long run. So, just recently I did find a place for line dancing (mostly to country tunes, but that's OK), and I did it with the group - as a participant for a change - for 2 hours...sweating bullets, but happy in the process, feeling like something close to freedom was within reach.
The only thing better is an impromptu Fred & Ginger style dance around the whole, open dance floor, which I've only done twice in my life - and the acquaintance/dance partner wasn't interested in doing it on a regular basis. This kind of dance is truly the closest I've come to pure joy and a feeling like flying. Even with line dancing, as a participant, with people watching, passing by, it's a reward to hear some who have genuinely commented "you go, girl!" - THAT is the happiness I sweat and try for - that communal feeling of joy, without divisiveness as an issue, free of judgment, fear or self-consciousness - and I always invite everyone to join in.
Wishing each their version of Fred & Ginger - whether it be as a couple together, or on a solitary path. If only it could be a regular, welcome experience, one that I wouldn't have to manufacture to enjoy!