I’m sorry you have been going through all of this. Stressful and devastating. Certainly a huge punch in the gut. I urge you to reach out to your local cancer center for emotional support and counseling. Here’s my story:
I had radiation for a low grade hormone positive BC in 1999. In 2017 I found a lump under my arm and it was spindle cell pleomorphic sarcoma. 2 surgeries to remove 2 ribs and get wide margins. Extremely painful recovery with questionable lung nodules. Then one year later they found another breast tumor in the exact spot where the radiation boost was delivered. Triple negative BC this time, bilateral mastectomy and chemotherapy. Possibly radiation induced but nobody has declared that. I had an emotional breakdown after the mastectomy surgery, no block given and woke up feeling like they had taken a burning hot machete and sliced off my breasts. It was a very traumatic experience and I still have flashbacks. You have been through some very traumatic experiences so you may want to consider some counseling to help cope with that. I’m 5 years out and still go for emotional therapy. It has helped me get out of my own anxiety and fear. It’s not easy and PTSD did a real thing. Please reach out to me when you need to talk, cry, swear, whatever it takes