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You' re welcomed, all just suggestions only... one shoe doesn't fill all. Understandable.how you feel. John Bradshaw doesn't preach thank goodness, just helps to understand. That's all . Best of Luck. The only thing my therapist explained to me that I had to let go of the anger which took me years. That was my personal problem otherwise it would eat me up which almost happen. In my case I found I had to deal with other challenges like loosing a baby, having cancer and most recently dealing with a kidney transplant and surgery which laid me in a hospital for four months. Maybe I adjust grateful and happy to be alive despite what I have experience and challenges was told not to have a pity party. Strange as other have not experience our own personal journey. Easy for them to say right? Walk the walk and then you can talk is my saying. Take care of yourself, yes there are a lot of people who care although we may not know you.
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in reply to @yani2023 I commend you for overcoming so many challenges in your life. I have had my share of grief, and like you, I make it a point to wake up each day with gratitude because I know that many did not wake up today, or they woke up and learned that their life would soon end. I thought I was doing well with my liver/pancreatic issues, lab tests that suggest multiple myeloma, etc, until I found a lump on my breast a few days ago. Normally I would not be as concerned as I am, but breast cancer runs rampant on my mother's side of my family. She died from it, as did my aunt and grandmother, Both of my sisters had breast cancer in their 60's. While my doctor told me yesterday he did not suspect the lump was of great concern, I know I will breathe a little easier once I have the diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound next week. Sometimes it feels like I cannot catch a break, but I still have gratitude because at this point in life, that is all we have. I too give much of myself to others without expecting anything in return. Sometimes I do feel let down by those who do not appreciate my kindness, but I try not to take it personally when I am shunned because of my disease, my "lifestyle" or any other thing for that matter. In any event, you seem to be doing a fantastic job handling everything life has thrown your way, and I admire your strength.
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I am gobsmacked (yes, that is a word) by all the other stuff you are going through. How strong you must be. I did have to have a total hip replacement and because I was alone, had to spend a month in one of those so-called skilled nursing facilities. Nursing is the last thing they do. Don't know how I survived. I was fortunate to find a caring caregiver when I came home and she looked after me for two months until I could do for myself. We still keep in touch. You have gone through and survived much more than me and for that I admire you. I am really going to try and work through the anger issues. Although I do have a wonderful therapist she is coping with family issues right now so don't know how long it will be before we meet again.