William,
Wow, there are no words to express how the comfort your reply (my first on this amazing support resource) brought to me so THANK YOU and thanks to whoever’s brilliant idea it was for Mayo to start Connect.

First my friend has seen a variety of oncologists but as he’s ready to throw in the towel and not seek any kind of treatment, nor even a 2nd opinion, he is not being very forthcoming with the specifics so I don’t know if cheek or squamous. His best friend is meeting with him today to encourage him to fight this but of course it’s his choice to make.

I am merely trying to learn as much as I can (in a hurry) in order to provide enough hope that he will, at least agree to request a 2nd opinion.
We’re hoping that he will agree to share all his records so 1) we can pursue a 2nd opinion at Univ of Chicago, which I’ve successfully used before with others. I’m also checking to see if MD Andersen, Sloan Kettering or Mayo offers a similar quick and reasonably priced (under$1,500) 2nd opinion.

I’ll also be exploring whether one of these 4 hospitals is doing more specialized research/trials specific to my friends which has been found in one tonsil and one lymph node by his doctors at Kansas University Cancer Center, who, I presume are giving my friend the reality that there is not much they can do to extend his life beyond 5 years for 50% of those in his condition.

The reason I asked about testing is because he was told (this is all second hand) that he can’t determine whether he has HPV or non-HPV but they are assuming that given a lifestyle of smoking (more than 10 packs a year) and drinking, that he is likely non-HPV.

He’s been advised that surgery is “too dangerous” given the location or cancerous cells.
After being advised of the numerous downsides of the typical warranted regiment of radiation and chemo ( lost of taste, physical and mental challenges, etc.) I can understand why he is opting to just enjoy the few years he has left without going through all of that.

As a friend (who’s out of state) I, also with his best friend, are merely trying to give him more information (including at least one 2nd opinion from one of these best cancer hospitals ) to make an informed decision.

While I don’t see him agreeing to participating, this includes investigating any clinical trials that might be applicable or other innovative treatments that might provide some hope. To that end in minutes I am about to head over to the Crerar Medical library at Univ of Chicago to spend the day exploring. I’ve had some success using this resource before including an positive outcome of 100% cancer free for another friend with bladder cancer.

Sorry this is so long but I’m hoping that you or others reading this will be able to give me candid feedback, direction as I devote my day to help bring some hope or if not, peace of mind about his best path forward. I also plan to uncover more great sites like SPOHNC which, in addition to provide a nice overview for a layman like me, could be helpful to his wife/caregiver. In the end, I’m just trying to help in any way I can as he would do for me if the tables were turned.

Thanks again