@cashemire I had external pelvic radiation therapy and two sessions of vaginal brachytherapy for endometrial cancer. I was advised to use a vaginal moisturizer to encourage healing and reduce scar formation. I was also advised to use a dilator because scar tissue from brachytherapy can occlude the vagina. This is a problem whether a person has a sexual partner or not. The reason is that with periodic pelvic follow-up appointments (I just had one this morning) the medical provider needs to be able to look in the vagina with a speculum. Since I've been using a dilator for over a year I learned that the moisturizer and the dilator both helped to expand tissue.

I found it difficult to get up-to-date medical care in my community for vaginal atrophy when I first became post-menopausal. What I have learned came from radiation oncology, and in-person appointments with the Women's Menopause and Sexual Health Clinic at Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN.

Do you feel comfortable talking with your primary care provider or your gynecologist about this?

A friend of mine got a set of dilators- you start with the smallest, and slowly work your way up to largest (or however large you want/ need it!). Her new partner is rather large, and between that and her vagina shrinking, penetration was painful. Good news: it worked really well. They aren't that expensive and do work.
Personally: I felt like my vagina was a tad snug after having no sex for 2 years. I decided to try a couple of different vibrators to get myself back into the hang of things, and the kind that also serves as a dildo was initially a bit big to get inside of my vagina. Using some good lube was quite helpful, and not trying to go to fast... Highly recommend it as a more fun way perhaps to loosen up your vagina. 🙂
Lastly: I highly recommend - now that I am having sex again- using lubricants. We have found that nothing is better than the silicone lubes, as they last. Water based dries out in minutes! I did research on the ones Mayo carries, and the Sliquid brand is definitely one of the very best out there! They even have "cubes" with an assortment to try. They have many options, both water and silicone based, organic or not, "tingly" or not.... You may have to try and see what works, but it makes a big difference! Good luck to all...