Bon,
I have allergic to 19 different meds. I have had antiphylactic shock, and am nervous to take anything. Then I had my first 2 mycrobacteria infections, I did them at home. IVs done myself, through a pic line, then a port, twice a day, for 9 months, 3 times a week, I also took 3 oral meds for 18 months. Scared? Yes. I did all the first IV and the first pills at the hospital. I was at NJH, so that made it better. But Im sure your dr. would let you do the same. I was also on ativan.
Now, years later, I have MAC. No meds yet, but Ive been on inhaled Tobi often. I have panic without the med now. I go to therapy. My heart has problems, and the constant anxiety and panic make heart issues worse, and pressure go through roof.
I'm not pushing anti anxiety drugs to anyone. That said, I could not have done any of this without them. They arent for everyone, and they can be addicting. I have tapered off twice. Something comes up, and I am back on them. Only small dose to calm me down.
Fear is a real thing, but without the drugs for these mycrobacteria, think of how bad things could be? The first time, they gave me my life back! That was 17 years ago. Talk to your doctor please.