I am glad you reached out to the group. It is scary to feel the way you do. Do you have a good support group of family and friends? I have been taking cymbalta for many years with zero side effects. It has been a good drug for me, helping with depression and pain associated with an autoimmune disease.
I hope it will help you. It sounds like you have been on so many different medications. I have also throughout the years. I started Welbutrin a year ago and it has made a difference for me. Less anxiety, less OCD, less depression and becoming able to not “sweat the small stuff”. Based on experience it can take awhile to find the right drug cocktail. I hope you can do so and feel better. Take care.