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You need to hold on for your sisters's sake. You love them and I figure they love you back.
Sadly, there are people in this world who don't have anybody. In that way, you actually are lucky. I don't mean to play down all the other bad stuff going on in your life. It sounds pretty darn tough. I'm just pointing out something good.
Maybe you should call a suicide prevention hotline? Or an emergency mental health number? You could google for the phone number... Or maybe call a minister/rabbi/priest? Or your county or state "services for the aging."
I'm sorry that I don't have more help to offer. When I get depressed, I try to remember this quote, "The night is darkest just before the dawn."
Prayers and good wishes to you!
Replies to "You need to hold on for your sisters's sake. You love them and I figure they..."
Well, first off, it is off-putting for me to hear someone say "you are lucky." So, I will offer my thoughts, which might be just as negative to someone else. Perhaps the next time you "wish to die" you might consider the fact that you do not know what the next world will bring...maybe something even worse than where you are now! And, consider the person who attempts to take their own life and the attempt fails, and they are left in worse shape....like, WHAT have I done now? Perhaps you can reconsider your wishes; there may be better choices and thoughts for you to make.
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Thanks for responding.
I do have 1 sister out of 6 that is my best friend.
The fact that nothing works is what a person says when they’ve hit bottom.
I have hit the bottom but I do have a psychiatrist and social worker and I had an appointment with the social worker yesterday. She took me to the bank because I needed some cash then we drove through Burger King and i took it home and she and I had an hour’s talk.
I feel better today thanks