@daphne52 (Kathy ?) I’m jumping in here regarding UTI (urinary tract infections) and kidney / bladder stones. I’ve experienced this and it is miserable. In your situation it sounds like it is excessive and persistent. @sally0526 and @cyndip1122 have made some good suggestions regarding second /third opinions and possible treatments. What concerns me most is your statement about feeling DESPERATE and “having thoughts about not being here”. Serious physical problems involving pain such as yours have a way of wearing you down emotionally and mentally. It is time (yesterday) to find the professional providers you need (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually). Often a friend or family member (your husband?) can be helpful in advocating for you. As others have said, “You are not alone”. My hope and prayer for you is that you find the help you need and can start looking forward to better tomorrows.
Cheryl