Hi everyone, my name is Lise and it's been about 3 1/2 months since my cancer diagnosis.

@san99999 I just went through a similar experience. I hope that since you posted things have become less ambiguous.

For me, ultrasound found 9 mm nodule that was determined after FNA to be (high likelyhood bethesda cat5) papillary carcinoma. My doctor considered it low risk so advised active surveillance since, like you mentioned, these small cancers can in fact stop growing and potentially never become a problem. He communicated his concerns about overtreatment of low risk thyroid microcarcinomas, but said that if it does start to change/grow we can still remove it without impacting positive outcome. Bottom line, he basically said it was up to me and what I felt comfortable with (some people just want it out asap) -- I decided to proceed with the active surveillance approach. We decided to do another ultrasound to make sure there was no change since December and, unfortunately, it grew 2 mm in 3 months ... so I am scheduled for surgery next month to remove the left lobe.

It was a bit of a difficult decision to make -- wait rather than opt immediately for surgery -- but once I did I actually felt a bit of relief. I have read every study I could find on active surveillance and asked my doctor a lot of questions. With the information I gathered I was able to actually calm down my anxiety a little and let myself trust that this is in fact slow growing and that I had some time to weight my options, get educated and settle in with a care team I feel I can trust.

Now that I am proceeding with the surgery I am feeling more of that anxiety creep back again -- worried about what it will feel like when I come out of anesthesia ... if I will need hormone replacement ... living with fears of recurrence ... etc ... and I'm very concerned about damage to my voice as I am a singer. I know its counter productive to get turned inside out about things that have not actually yet happened, but it's really hard. Trying to stay positive and not feel sorry for myself. Reminding myself that all things considered I am lucky it is treatable and was caught early.

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