@jhornsby, you've got a good fellow traveller in @koh. I hope you saw their reply to you.

I know it sounds scary to hear that your case is going before the Cancer Board, but this is a very good thing and is commonly done. It allows all members of the cancer team to come together to discuss you and your cancer. Just think of it as all the best minds focused on giving you the best advice and, if necessary, treatment for the best outcomes.

For now, I might suggest focusing on all the things, people and experience you want to live for. 🙂 Be kind to yourself. And when your mind starts whirring around with worry, just come back here. Write down your concerns, your questions and let them go.