@rainyp I was told by many sources (my radiation oncologist, my nurse practitioner, Cancer education group at Mayo Clinic) that this anxiety is very common and normal after treatment. You have been through something that none of us imagined and we weren't prepared for any of it. I became depressed about halfway through my radiation treatments and I did talk with the radiation oncologist about it. That's how I got involved in the Cancer Education group.

Before my first two appointments after I finished radiation I was very, very anxious to the point that I had to intentionally practice my cognitive-behavioral skills to reframe my thinking and practice mindfulness medication all day before my appointment. It's been one year and I was less anxious at my most recent appointment (in mid-December).

Do you have a mental health therapist you work with? If not, can your oncologist refer you to a mental health therapist who is skilled in working with cancer patients? I believe our needs do differ just enough that it helps to have someone who is skilled in this area.

It's a good insight that you pretended to be fine when you weren't. Some people aren't even aware that they are doing that and our providers tend to believe what we tell them instead of looking at our faces and body language and listening to our voice that are telltale signs that we very frightened.

What can you do for yourself that is soothing? Take bath? Listen to music you like? Watch a favorite movie? Practice yoga?