Hey Shane. Don't feel badly about yourself. Being a "I'll do it myself" guy means you are not a baby. You are an independent thinker and survivor. None of us are bad people just because we are or were an addict. Addiction does NOT discriminate. Thanks to the survivors out there, we have places like "The Betty Ford Clinic" and AA and so on. When I was in that dark tunnel of withdrawals trying to claw my way out, I could still see the light at the end. As the months went by, the light got brighter and brighter, and I eventually climbed out. I still have a few scars from it, but I am doing so much better now, and it feels like a vail was lifted from my eyes about myself. I still get w/d from time to time but not anything like it was. Now, I just slap myself back to my feet. You will climb out of this--believe me and believe in yourself.