For a different issue my hometown doctors were not helpful either. This was menopause-related and I received very poor and outdated information from my home town doctors that affected my quality of life. However, I didn't know where to go or who to ask and it wasn't until I went to Mayo Clinic for endometrial cancer that I then got a referral to the Women's Sexual Health and Menopause Clinic that provided up-to-date and helpful information.

My advice is not to blame yourself for what you didn't know. You trusted your local doctor because that's what we do. You cannot change the past but you now know to advocate for yourself going forward. I'm now doing the same and I figure if a doctor or other medical provider gets arrogant or snippy with me (and that happened around the menopause issues) I'm not putting up with that and will find another doctor.

You've been through something very difficult that not many people go through. Please remind yourself to be compassionate with yourself and forgive yourself for what you didn't know in the past.

Does this help?