It's sad to realize that many of us, including me are fearful of the future. I try to live in the moment and my decisions thus far.
The wait to have reconstruction is very difficult and annoying. I'm in the same position. I found a physical therapist that is helping me with range of motion and strengthening my chest muscles to ready me for the next step. I want to live my best life and fear only takes that away from me. I wish you well in the decisions you make