I'm so sorry. I'm close to your age and have also had life changes, but nothing like you it sounds like. I initially went to the orthopedist because I thought there was something wrong with my shoulder but the shoulder guy felt the problem stemmed my neck and was referred to another surgeon. After the cervical surgeries (I had to have revision because I developed MRSA osteomyelitis) I was convinced there was something still going on in my shoulder but gradually it got better until I had a huge flare-up while on vacation. I ended up in the ER, where once again, they said it was my neck and not my shoulder. My surgeon just ordered an MRI and CT. The MRI shows serious compression of the thecal sac and cord at C3-4 and at this point looks like I'm lined up again for neck surgery. That said, you are in the early recovery phase when shoulder pain is at it's worst (from positioning). But considering your pain levels I might suggest you ask for imaging of your shoulder. There is always a chance that pathology may be found accounting for your extreme pain. I do not believe most post ACDF patients have shoulder pain to the degree you are describing (which sounds close to a 9/10). Also, at this stage people are using cold pads to bring down pain levels. There are also icing machines you can rent which provide continuous icy-level water. Maybe you could ask to try that though I'm unsure if its contra-indicative considering shoulder replacement. I really feel for you, honestly. You need lots of big hugs