Connect
← Return to Treatment for generalized anxiety: Is tough-love ever used?
Discussion
Treatment for generalized anxiety: Is tough-love ever used?
Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Jun 28 5:49am | Replies (44)Comment receiving replies
@talbot Alanon is an adjunct 12-step program to Alcoholics Anonymous, attended by family and friends of alcoholics and drug addicts. I have not attended these meetings, but have heard that they can offer guidance on how to deal with/live with those affected by substance abuse.
Perhaps an honest conversation with your son regarding his employment situation, what might be keeping him from holding onto a job and how he can remedy that, will help you both. At some point we have to make a decision to "sink or swim", as much as it hurts us. I have known several people who decided to not carry their child financially, and that youngster needed that push to stand on their own two feet. I sincerely hope that the funds you are sending him are not cutting in to your own life, and ability to care for yourself [food and necessities]?
Ginger
Replies to "@talbot Alanon is an adjunct 12-step program to Alcoholics Anonymous, attended by family and friends of..."
Connect
Ginger, you are so right in recommending the Alanon program. Although it is primarily known for guidance in cases of alcohol/substance abuse, it is much more. It offers guidance in detaching from the problems of a loved one, not the loved one, whatever the problems may be. This would include adult children who for whatever reason do not stand on their own two feet. It is a philosophy to maintain your own mental health while still showing love.
This is a healthy path for anyone who struggles with the guilt of not helping a loved one (financially, or emotionally) and the knowledge that each of us must make our own way. As an adult child of an alcoholic mother, I can attest to the value of the Alanon program. It not only helped me come to terms with my mother's alcoholism, but the philosophy has helped me maintain a healthy balance in every relationship I have. You do not have to go to the meetings if you do not wish to, as they have many books from which you can learn the philosophies.