@aprilg
You've already identified the key to sustaining the battle, HOPE. Without hope, all is lost. My wife, with my unrelenting hope and support battled pancan for 3 years. At the end of August we went to the ER to get admitted because she had an intestinal blockage and needed to start IV nutrition. After getting a new CT scan, the hospitalist comes in and says there's nothing we can do, go home, we'll get you started with hospice. I physically removed him from the room and screamed right in his face to never come back. Until that moment, we certainly had our doubts but never succumbed to them. We did get admitted by our oncologist and she rallied when TPN started. Halfway through our 11 day stay, who shows up but Dr death and he orders the TPN stopped. It took 2 shift changes for a sympathetic charge nurse to ignore the Drs orders and she restarted the TPN. This process repeated itself 2 more when my wife decided to give up. Without hope there's no survival. My wife passed on 9/14 fighting to the last moment.