My first diagnosis was the ovarian cancer in 2008, which was a total surprise and ultimately ended up destroying my marriage about 8 years later due to always feeling pain with intimacy. At that time I had no chemo or radiation for follow up and was told because it was stage 1A, there is no follow up needed. In 2017, only 6 months after the divorce was final, I became sick again and found out it was the endometrioid diagnosis. During the years between, I had more than my share of abdominal troubles and I ask myself if the newer diagnosis should have been that much of a surprise. In addition to the abdominal pain there's been pain in my back that makes sitting for hours at a desk excruciating, yet I need to continue to work. I have the best benefits my employer offers in a 3 tiered selection of health coverage, yet I am still recovering financially from the divorce and have little prospect to allow for retirement anytime soon after 32 years with this employer. It would be difficult to move to another position that pays what I am making now and reluctance to go is based on my current financial state and the state of the current economy. I'm exhausted and it's becoming a rather depressing situation that I feel I can't bring up to anyone at this point. I appreciate everyone's input. I'm still grateful for every day I wake up. It's the overwhelming feeling of having to have more visits and tests with little to no relief of the pain that is dragging me down.

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