Hello:
This sounds very familiar to me. It will be 18 years this coming January that I had the same procedure. It took me a very long time to heal. I won't go into the details, but as I recall, it is very similar to what I experienced with my own healing.
Here are some of my thoughts.
1. Appetite and weight loss is normal. Dr. Chari (no longer at Mayo, but was my wonderful pancreatic specialist) suggested that I consume simple carbohydrates, as they were easier to digest. I took Creon with every time I ate except when I had candy. (I'm a Dietitian, so I had to toss the "eat well" guidelines out the window during this time.) I lost a lot of weight, too, but it came back over time.
2. There are a lot of supplements he can take (liquid type calories) in the form of any product that tastes good to him. (I do not work for any company and do not promote their specific products) but you can try Ensure Clear (juice based) or Sustacal (many like this one), etc. Check at your local pharmacy. Then, you can always order it on-line.
3. Yes, I went to the bathroom tons.......mannnnn.....
4. Check out a company called "UNJURY." You can find them on-line. (I do not work for them, etc. as above.) BUT, I like their protein powder (at this point years after my recovery) because of the taste (chocolate.) You have to mix it with a liquid. I use Lactaid milk (for dairy intolerance--- use skim...fat in products will go right through him.) The protein bars have too much fiber for him at this point.
5. Yes, frequent small low fat meals are best. Later on, I can tell you more about some of the nutrients that his MD can look at. (Malabsorption of some exist---I've had deficiencies...) But there is time for that.
6. In the meantime, try not to pressure him to eat. It may be stressful for him, at least it was for me. Take flowers, some lovely, peaceful music (check out the Mayo Cancer Education Center....they have free CD's on meditation, I think.) He will need lots of rest. Sugared, low fat, tasty sweets (yes, brush after) - I ate a lot of these in the beginning.
7. Mayo MD's, nurses, support systems (cancer library), etc. are the best. Even the art I saw during that time helped me heal.
8. Take care of you.....breathe...if you have spiritual support, that may be helpful.
Gosh, hope that is is not too much...I could write a short book!
Best to you and your family.
Moderator- don't know if I can sign my name and professional credentials??