That was my first reaction, also, and I have asked him to consider this from every angle though I know his wife's wishes put pressure on him and I agree his wife must come first as the marriage vows promise. He is 70, the times are unsettled in so many ways, and he has mobility issues which concern me in the extreme winters there, but also I have doubts that their reasons for moving are sound and practical - so all my concerns are not just about me. It's tricky to press them without damaging our relationship so I feel the compromises will have to come from me. Strangely enough, with each helpful message here, including yours, I feel more able to deal with being alone- stronger and less dependent. I so appreciate the support I have received. Many thanks.