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@realitytest

Indeed, as long as you were married for at least ten years (and haven't remarried) you can collected on his benefits - 1/2 even he's still living and remarried, and 100% if he's dead. (I couldn't manage without that! The only help he ever provided, having cheated me out of my legal share of his pension!)

His lawyer was a whiz, while mine was a dud. Our settlement was being drawn up when our son had a terrible breakdown. I was focussed on trying to insure he graduated from High School (he had begun the year as Valedictorian!) and didn't lose his acceptance to Harvard.

For the first time ever I didn't double check such an important contract (written in legalese). Since his father didn't care about his son's crisis, he was able to work brilliantly with his lawyer. Quite a trade-off!

Son's academic stuff was salvaged, but my financial survival was trashed. I didn't even discover it until years later when applying for second son's financial aid to his university.

Thank Heaven for Social Security! I hope future retirees don't lose out on that payback for their long years of labor, during which they paid heavily into the system. I'm still amazed that former spouses are eligible for so much reimbursement - even more if the ex has died - as mine just did. (I had been unable to work while our first son was growing up, as he was seriously mentally and physically disabled, requiring my full attention). Because of his high intellect and academic success, though, he did succeed in acceptance to Harvard - completely paid.
It took everything I had to guide him, though (spending every dime on therapy, special camps, and more), Meanwhile my own life - economic and social, was cancelled.

It seemed his opportunities had been salvaged, though, by my dedicated work with him (he was in super Special Education, beginning with four preschool expulsions and more. He couldn't even attend kindergarten.) That extreme (still unexplicable) breakdown threw everything back into chaos., however.

Somehow I managed to rescue it working with the school and Harvard - at the expense of my rightful share of his father's pension, though - on which my own survival as an elder depended.

And there I am now (but with serious medical disabilities - mobility limits and even looming blindness.) .

Again, my infinite gratitude for the Social Security program!

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Replies to "Indeed, as long as you were married for at least ten years (and haven't remarried) you..."

I’m sorry to hear about your son. My first husband is deceased. Car wreck and he was a passenger but the seatbelt didn’t work on that side of the owners car. My son was 18 at the time. I thought he was going to do something. Suicide, I was scared to death for him. My husband and I were avid gun collectors, and for home protection. We trained and knew the laws and so did my son. They were put up but he knew where and had his own key. I got them all out of the house and took them to a friend of mine that I could trust and asked him to hold on to them for a while. I couldn’t imagine losing my best friend and then my only child. But anyway all is ok now this was end of 2001. I did remarry. I had known him for 16 years. I was friends with his ex. Boy did I not know what went on behind closed doors. He was lazy and liked to spend money too much. My money. Finally 3 years later I said I’ve had it, we’re done. Didn’t think much about a divorce decree. The legal separation cost a fortune and all the stuff was mine anyway. But then years later someone told me I could collect my deceased husband’s social security as long as I was fully divorced from the idiot. I had to wait till I was 60. I turned 60 this year so I’m in the process of the divorce and change my name back to my previous married name. Then head to social security. I didn’t think I would need a lawyer for that. Hope you and your son are well!