Thank you for your words of comfort. However, it seems that everything is going wrong. Yesterday my cleaning person called. She is very ill and does not know when (or if) she will be returning. It is hard for me to clean because I am not yet fully recovered from my hip replacement and I am too darn old. I will do a bit of freshening up during the next few days but it's not the same as cleaning. Also the man who said he would come once a month to do the yard didn't show up. I am beginning to feel that I am being punished for something. As for preparation for death, that was easy. We both made plans years ago with The Neptune Society. So it was in place long before either of us thought of death. I think it may have been easier for me because of the many years I worked for a probate and trust attorney and saw the results of what happens when people fail to do this. Many are superstitious and are afraid. Too bad. Buying a cemetery lot or making plans for cremation doesn't lead to death the next day. Actually that is selfish. If you delay look at the burden you place on your heirs. What I am doing now is gathering information on assisted living options as I am completely alone. This I find extremely difficult because of so many unknowns. You cannot know if you will become disabled. You cannot know if or when. You cannot know what form this will take. Will it be dementia or mobility? Next month I will tour a facility that was recommended. I am going to talk to various professionals who do this. I will leave the information with my trust documents and my trustee will have to make that decision. I believe I will have done all I can.
And I am angry with what is happening in the world. We are literally burning up and the people who can start to effect a change are sitting back and doing nothing. I have seen a lot of changes in my 87 years; some good and some bad. In the last four to five years they have been mostly bad. I wonder what is going to happen to my grandchildren. Too much time to think. Now I must try to start on a little housework and then rest.