@fdixon63 I understand your fear. Another way to think about this is that you have a second chance to fix this problem, and the earlier that is caught, the better. We are not just affected by fate... and you have the choice to change your outcome. It is so easy to focus on a negative problem and get your mind stuck there. Fear of danger helped humans evolve, but it doesn't always serve us well. We can choose to think differently and just understand that after the anxiety response, we pick ourselves up and think rationally about problem solving. I do think your provider will be focused on catching a problem and that is what you want. Make sure to ask questions. The worst that you could do is ignore it. I consider myself to be very lucky because after my husband ignored a bump on his hand for a year, I was concerned and found a dermatologist and got an appointment for him. They took a biopsy that shaved the top half off and also removed some abnormal moles. Any guesses what that bump was?

Malignant melanoma, the most dangerous and deadly of the skin cancers. Once that spreads, the chances of a cure are very low. It was the size of a pencil eraser and the same color. The dermatologist didn't recognize it and thought it was something else, but 10 days later the pathology report came back, we got a call to see a surgeon ASAP. Waited 2 weeks for that appointment, then scheduled for surgery about 2 weeks later which was big enough to require a skin graft the size of a slice of pepperoni. We were lucky. It had not spread. Now the checkups are often. It was every quarter at first, and now dermatology checks are every 6 months. Checkups with surgeon every 6 months. He has a lot of abnormal moles, and after a couple years, now they are finding less things that they want to remove and check.

After the initial biopsy, the melanoma was still present and the skin healed because it was deep. Moles that were biopsied didn't always get it all either. I learned what abnormal moles looked like and I had one between my toes, so I went for my first skin check. The biopsy didn't get it all, so I returned for a second procedure to get the rest. It's always good to get the eyes of the pathologist looking at something, and if something doesn't seem right, speak up and ask about it. I learned something too, about helping my husband who wasn't advocating for himself, and about not ignoring my own because I didn't like getting cut with sharp objects. In the grand scheme of things, those days are just a small fraction of my and my husband's lives, but if I wasn't paying attention, the consequences could have been serious and I would be grieving a very personal loss.

Yes, I am lucky, but my choices helped get me there.

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