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Moderation and Modification: How can it help your chronic pain?
Chronic Pain | Last Active: Dec 21, 2023 | Replies (33)Comment receiving replies
@thenazareneshul Thank you, thank you, thank you for contributing your perspective and experience of the past 30 years. Wow, an amazing lesson that you've applied to life and disability. I love that you hit the nail on the head and brought to light "good enough is good enough". Also, problem solving and acceptance. Your focus on finding the things you can do and accepting that some things you just have to let go of is right on point.
You're right, it kind of does sound like a study for a college class! Ha ha - that made me chuckle. 😊
It's actually "Moderation and Modification 101", in plain and simple terms and what I learned while attending Mayo Clinic's 3 week rehabilitation clinic. It's amazing that when someone is struggling to accept physical changes and a disability, their mental state wavers and things like these basic "101" lessons seem very overwhelming to apply.
Again, thank you for pitching in with your experience and positive outlook. You've provided great examples of how self-care is not selfish, even if it takes 4 times as long to get dressed. I think you're pretty amazing!
What other tips have worked for you over the years? I know I find myself struggling with perfectionism still. Although I do let a lot go and overlook, it's still hard, some days more than others. Do you have any advice?
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Yup. I once (and only once) had a Care Coordinator. She had polio when she was young, and now pretty much spends all her time outside of bed, in a wheelchair. She's married, and has raised 5 children, and also her sister's 2 kids. She gave me a little lesson once about "being responsible." She told me that response-ablity is the meaning of that word "responsible" and that people get it's true meaning wrong all the time. I might be able to respond to many things other people would not, or could not expect of me, but that doesn't mean whatever situation or need is my fault. It means I am able to respond to it. Which is not to say that others are not response-able, too. Some may or may not be more response-able than me. Yet, if they do nothing and it's an important need, like say a child is being abused and I know of it, then it does come down to me to respond. What can I do about it? Well, actually, a whole assortment of things, just sitting at my desk. On the flip side, what I can not respond to, I am not response-able for. Still, can I help still? Maybe. Such as if I can make a phone call and the house next door is burning, sure, I can't run over there, but I can call 911. That might be all I can do, too. And never am I unable to pray, unless I'm just plain "out of it" via sleep or unconscious. In which case, I'm not responsible for anything, so don't beat myself up about it. The end result of all these things is learning to throw off other people's guilt trips and ideas of who is beautiful, and who isn't, things like that. It also means that when someone loves us still, it's value is beyond measure.