@jakedduck1, and others...Hi, there, my friend. Yep, I feel like a new person actually. Think I'm the real me for the first time in all 75 years of this crazy life. I have an inner peace about life that this acceptance brings. Strange isn't it, we work so hard to get nowhere until we reach this point in life. With acceptance, life is so much easier.

Epilepsy truly framed my life, until 2 years ago. When I was 11 and had my first grand mal seizure, epilepsy was considered demon possession. I was a closet...hmmm...can't say epileptic. I never called myself an epileptic. Just that I have epilepsy, or later, a seizure disorder. I never accepted having epilepsy, Leonard. I fought it all my life. How exhausting.

2 years ago I went through a 4-day seizure hospitalization at Mayo to diagnose my seizures and understand what's going on now. It was very frightening for me, even after all these years. The thought of having my medications taken away was scary, as all my life I knew if I missed a dose of the horrible stuff we took back then that destroyed our teeth and gums and did horrid things to our bodies, our brains, our personalities... I would pay for it with a grand mal seizure that night and a day or more of zoning out, exhaustion, nausea, etc.

I did have a difficult time with the hospitalization but found I no longer have epilepsy. I was having occasional seizures with unknown causes, probably emotional or stress, and anxiety..for the last 20 years. They were different, without the longer-term effects of the past. I choose to believe this was a change in my seizures, not an indication of misdiagnosis, as I will not believe I had the life I had with epilepsy and didn't really have it! No way!

I now have tremor attacks usually in the morning as I'm waking. Sometimes my whole body tremors, and it can take me out for a day or so to rest, for the tremors to slow. Today, with all the stress of the last few months with my son's situation, I awoke and had serious tremors for several hours. I do quiet, soft breathing, work on relaxing and help my body to a calmer place. It's no fun, my friend, but different from seizures. May be related to Parkinson's, don't know for sure. I have Parkinson's symptoms and take Requip nightly for RLS and to help me with movement. It works wonders.

I suppose I'll visit my neurologist soon for confirmation and to see if there's additional treatment. At the moment, I'm focused solely on getting my son through this time. 20 years with dystonia and now it's taking over his body, with jerking and seizing and more pain. We must have a gene that's damaged and causing these types of diseases. Having clinical genomics consult next week.

I'm off all meds now for pain and seizures and the heavy stuff. This cleared my brain, the fog is gone and my thinking is much improved. I'm taking Cymbalta for the fibro and Robaxin for muscle relaxation, but no gabapentin or Lyrica or oxycodone or .....Now, therapy pool, 1-1 MM tincture, breathing, meditation, music...Voltaren and magnesium lotion, etc. A big change in my life. My mind and body are more in sync. Amazing feeling.

I haven't seen your discussions lately. Hope you are getting in some walking and eating properly. It's not easy living alone in our older life, is it? I have to work to do everything, but...
Missed you, dear, and hope to be online a bit more as Rob improves. Also, I have my new laptop! Love it and it makes me sooooo happy!

Be well, Don't be good. Be blessed. Elizabeth