@artsy6013, @jakedduck1, and all...Yes, it is a long slog. It is for me a lifetime of stress, illness, and struggles, but lots of good times as well. I just deal with depression and anxiety from stress every day to some extent.

You know what's helped me the most and I learned this on the Connect site...acceptance. I've finally, after all these 75years, just last year begun the acceptance process, accepting my life as it is now. No expectations about today, and acceptance of yesterday as it happened and tomorrow if it happens. This has released me from a heavy load on my shoulders and heart. No more do I dread every day or hate the past or expect wonderful things tomorrow, or the reverse. No more do I carry my life on my shoulders. What freedom to live life.

Today is just what it is. My body today is what it is. Not what I expected it would be but what it is. And that is ok. The same with tomorrow. Yes, I plan with appts and maybe a list or such, but no expectations anymore. Then, no disappointment and failure from missed expectations. Wow! that relieves me of a lot of pressure and sadness. I love this new thinking. Lost expectations used to set me up for failure and depression. I don't allow that most days now.

You know, it seems I'm much more in control now. I think that's what acceptance of my illnesses and aches/pains, my body now has done for me. I now control the way I think, to some degree. I'm not fighting the world every day to make it conform to my expectations. Phew...what a relief.

Hope some of this helps. It's helped me and again, from these folks on Connect come lots of goodies to help through whatever today is. Such as, my friend, Leonard,@jakedduck1, reminds me when I even think of him, that chocolate is my friend. And, Leonard, I now buy Stouffers sugar-free made with Stevia chocolate tidbits. Pretty darn good. And, much better for my health. Not as delicious, I agree, but still pretty good. A diabetic neighbor put me onto this trick. I have a chocolate or dark choc covered mint when I want it and it satisfies that permanent need for something sweet. The stevia sugar substitute is natural, so not a nasty chemical.

Enjoy this day. I'm in Florida, it's summer, and right now we're having a serious afternoon thunderstorm. I'm back in bed after taking my son for a nerve ablation procedure to attempt to slow some pain he suffers from dystonia. It's been 20 years of serious pain and he's at his end. So, with a Dilaudid pump, oral meds, medical marijuana, nerve blocks that last 12-15 hours-not the 1-2 months as advertised, and a lot of screaming the last several months, he got this ablation procedure today. He's quiet now, so it may be helping him some. I pray for relief. Next week we see a Mayo neurosurgeon re possible brain surgery. We'll see. Today, the thunderstorm is lovely from my bedroom window. I'm resting after a difficult morning with increased tremors.

Rest is a good thing. I'm hopeful that some of these thoughts help you figure out how for you to deal with this old nasty depression. It took me 75 years to learn these things. I suppose I'm a pretty slow learner, but thankfully I connected with this place and received some good advice.

Be well, my new connect friend. This is one day, live and be blessed. Elizabeth