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@billchitwood

Both his side and my side think he needs to be in a memory facility as the falls are becoming more and more dangerous. Today he can't remember how to use the controls for his lift chair - or he is using that as an excuse to have me do all his fetch and carrying (family doctor wants him moving around - carefully using walker). He can get his own water but refuses to. I have always found it easier to fetch and carry then to incur his anger when told no. He even gets angry when I ask him to wait a minute as I'm in the middle of something. His son thinks I've created his problem by waiting on him our whole married life. I also realize how terrified and anxious his kids are as they see how he is going downhill fairly quickly - physical as well as mental. He no longer likes phone calls as he has problems operating the phone - along with the memory problem.

With dementia the whole family suffers in one way or another.

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Replies to "Both his side and my side think he needs to be in a memory facility as..."

You're so right, Julie. With dementia, the whole family does suffer. Based on what you described, it does sound like a memory care facility would be the safest place for him to be. It seems like you're hanging by threads at this point. Do you have access to a medical social worker who can help with the transition? I guess you and the other family members will have to brace for his anger for a while, but that will pass. I hope there is a good facility nearby.
Please keep posting.

Ian can still do a fair number of chores, which I give him to do, as I want him to stay active as long as he can. His favorite occupation is resting in bed. So since your post, I started telling him "Resting is rusting." He laughs.

Stay strong.