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Spouse with cognitive problems and finances

Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: Dec 30, 2022 | Replies (290)

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@billchitwood

As of Monday it will be two weeks since we closed on our home and moved in with our daughter.
Just before the move Bill fell in the bathroom and it took forever to get him back on his feet. Then he was to use Robin's walk in shower but before we realized what he was doing there was a terrible crashing sound - he had decided to use the tub shower and had taken a fall. Fortunately both times he only suffered scrapes and bruises. He is using his walker more now.

Since Robin now sees him more than a few minutes at a time she has noticed that I was right - his words are slurring and some of his conversation is hard to figure out. Plus some of his blogs are becoming difficult to follow. And he has become more paranoid and sure the family is conspiring against him (this was true even before we moved).

And bedtime has now become 6 or 6:30pm and he is hurt when I don't join him in going to bed at that time. He is also sleeping in later and still napping during the daytime.

One good thing, Robin installed Hulu on his computer so he can watch his movies and sports. While the computer is difficult for him to use it is easier than the TV remote. We are hoping to get his hearing aids paired to the computer so it will stream directly into his ears. Not quite sure how to do it or what is needed. At least that way the neighbors wouldn't have to listen to his movies!

He is also worried about me spending money as he wants the kids to get it all. I have always done the finances, taxes, etc. but always kept him informed. Now I try not to mention anything financial as it sets him off. He also was checking out cars the other day - wanted our car license (which I told him I would have to get later). He shouldn't ever get behind the wheel again although he thinks he can drive as well as ever.

I have been keeping a diary for the doctor - and keeping the kids updated. Like Robin, they only see him when he is on 'showtime'. Which is getting harder for him to maintain.

Thank heavens for Mayo Connect people. Bless you all.

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Replies to "As of Monday it will be two weeks since we closed on our home and moved..."

@billchitwood Julie, it has been such a roller-coaster for you recently, hasn't it?

How good to hear that your daughter Robin can now also see what you have been noticing, and she can support you more in your quest to have your husband lead the best life he can for now. And it sounds like his life is changing rapidly, which can cause anger, sadness, and grief for everyone involved, as you are finding out.

What are you doing to keep yourself relaxed, and healthy? What has made you smile today?
Ginger