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Just diagnosed with Endometrioid Adenocarcinoma: What to expect?
Gynecologic Cancers | Last Active: Dec 12, 2022 | Replies (239)Comment receiving replies
@cmb2022 I share my feelings with a few very close friends and yet I can't quite find the words to share how I feel about cancer. I do have one close friend who "gets" me if you know what I mean. She loves me so deep down and knows how to validate my feelings in a way that feels like no other. We've known one another for over 40 years.
I'm selective who I tell about my cancer for the reasons you stated. It's not that it's a big secret. I just don't want to explain how very complex cancer diagnosis and treatment is and that not every cancer is the same.
I've been an anxious person for as long as I can remember. But here's the catch. With this nervousness comes a conscientiousness in my life that got me through school and my work life. We all approach uncertainty differently. I had a total hip replacement at Mayo and was so very appreciative that an education session that was scheduled the day before my surgery. Presumably Mayo "knows" that patients do better when they know what to expect.
Here's a book I like that introduced me to radical acceptance.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000FC2NHG/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1
Of course you are nervous about your appointment in June. Someone else may say to you "oh, that's so far away, what are you worried about?". Not helpful and I've heard comments like that many times. Being nervous about our cancer surveillance appointments comes with where we are in our lives as cancer survivors. We don't like it but it's there.
Thank you for the compliments. I so appreciate them. And thank you for always asking about me.
Replies to "@cmb2022 I share my feelings with a few very close friends and yet I can't quite..."
I, too, have always been an anxious person, with the accompanying conscientiousness that has served me well. But cancer, of course, is a whole new level of anxiety.
Based on what I've learned, I have about a 20% chance of recurrence; so that's the number that's always in my head -not the 80% chance that I'm fine. Consider this: What if every time you got into your car, there was a 20% chance that you'd have a bad accident. Not unreasonable to be a very nervous driver...
I was hoping that after each good 3 mo. check I could put the fear aside until the next one. Nope.
@naturegirl5 , Yes, I felt compelled to share with a few people initially, but pretty much all of them were dismissive of the diagnosis. "Oh, you don't need treatments, you don't look sick, you are able to return to work, etc...." while I don't want to dwell on the situation it is in the back of my head. Even my family has been dismissive. I so appreciate the support that I receive here.
I am so glad that you have a great friend of many years for support.
Right now I don't feel like a cancer survivor. I pray that I will feel that way soon.
How was dinner with your neighbors and you are welcome. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Oh course I want to know how you are.
Enjoy your Sunday!
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Really appreciate this conversation about lingering fears after treatment. It's a lot to hear how closely we'll be monitored, and for how long. And I couldn't agree more that dismissive comments are so not helpful! Second the recommendation of Tara Brach's work on radial acceptance 🙂