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I hope you make it . . .

Breast Cancer | Last Active: Jul 7, 2023 | Replies (15)

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@roch

Thanks for sharing. During cancer treatment I felt like I lost my identity. I was no longer Laurie, but Laurie with CANCER. In beginning I kept diagnosis secret except for close family and few friends. But once lost hair to chemo, everyone knew. Most people do not know how to react. Either they say SORRY, or tell you about someone else who had cancer.

I am not sure what I wanted to hear, the best response is "is there anything I can do to help?", and to keep checking back. Cancer treatment goes on for years and patient needs support entire time.

I hope I have learned from experience and when someone tells me bad news. I respond with appropriate response.

This might be good topic for discussion, what is an appropriate response?

Laurie

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Replies to "Thanks for sharing. During cancer treatment I felt like I lost my identity. I was no..."

Your words are spot-on, Laurie. Even my grown children did not know what to say. . . but maybe, I didn't know what I needed to hear, either. One of our sons went through childhood cancer at 15 months of age, so I was initiated to the uncomfortable responses from others. . . but this time, feeling it again WITH the disease this time, it was painful. I typically tell a person who is struggling that I'm sorry, and I genuinely am. And then I'm just available to them. I find that has been very helpful for both the person struggling and for me. I can't explain away their trial, nor can I identify completely with what the person is going through - but I can understand human suffering. And for that, I can express my empathy.