Hi upartist,
Yes I've reached out many times, but to no avail. Oh well. I just live with it. That was a very rare outpour of my actual thoughts. I don't do it anymore, and I gave up on CBT even though I know it's my cure. Someone like me needn't bother trying to structure their thoughts. Don't know about the one thing at a time. There's too many things. Yes it's overwhelming. I wasn't about to attempt suicide so the crisis line isn't the right place to call.