You may want to read the book, "Shouting Doesn't Help", by Katherine Bouton. It's an excellent resource for understanding what helps a person with hearing loss and what does not. Check it out on Amazon. One of the first 'rules' of living with someone else's hearing loss is to always get their attention before trying to talk to them. While 3 seconds may feel like a full minute to a hearing person, it is worth using that wee bit of time to access attention. It's also important to understand that background noise distorts hearing. Turn off the TV, the music, the dishwasher, the fan, or whatever else is creating that noise. You probably don't even notice it yourself, but it is a barrier to desired sound for the person with HL.

It's unfortunate that some hearing aids do not have manual volume control. People do need to be able to turn them up or down depending on the environment. Automatic controls are promoted as positive new options. Most people who have used hearing aids for any length of time will tell you that they want to be able to control them. Mentioning this only because it could be a reason why your husband doesn't hear you when you speak. First and foremost though....get his attention before you start talking.

PS: You many know most of this since you use hearing aids yourself. 🙂

Greetings to you and thank you for joining the conversation! Sadly, I can relate to your husband, esp the short-term memory loss part! I agree with Julie's answer that shouting doesn't work. Get his attention first, then speak to him face-to-face in a kind way. Of course, you may need to raise your voice some, but hopefully not to the point of yelling. Impatiently raising one's voice to get someone's attention (facial expressions do matter) can be more detrimental than effective. I'm glad you all smile, but friendly gestures to get his attention BEFORE speaking most likely generate the best results. It's a fairly simple thing to do. One of the worst things I've heard is something along the line of, "I've been trying to get your attention for the past three minutes!" And I'm made to feel like it's all my fault because I'm only NOW getting the message! Can I help it if I didn't hear you for those three minutes? (And of course, this begs the question as to whether or not it was REALLY three minutes or might you be exaggerating just a little?).

It sounds as though your husband's hearing is worse than yours. You may need to compensate in other ways. This is extreme, but I remember how I could call my dad on the phone from 700 miles away and have a nice conversation, but when I went to visit him, the dynamics changed and I found myself writing down questions for him to read and answer! While he was in a long-term care facility, one day a doctor friend stopped by to visit and told him, "I didn't see you in church yesterday!" A puzzled look came over my dad's face and he replied, "PEANUT BUTTER???!!!" I then realized his hearing loss had deteriorated into something a little more serious than I had previously realized! Anyway, I'm glad you're bearing with your husband and I'm sure just knowing you love him no matter what means A LOT to him! We all need that reassurance. Thanks again!