Hello, @cloudycarol Welcome to Mayo Connect! I am sad to read of your husband's diagnosis but glad you found Connect. I'm Scott and I was my wife's caregiver for her 14+ year war with brain cancer.

I wish I had some magic answer to your question, but all I can do is relate what worked, or helped, for me. Outside help was not an option for us, so I had to figure out some hacks quickly since as you already know there are never enough hours in a caregiver's day!

The thing that helped me the most was to learn to ignore some things I had never done in the past. I came to embrace that there would always be a pile of dirty laundry to do, that my shirts didn't really need to be ironed, that the dishes could wait, and dust bunnies became my newest pet, rather than pest 🙂

I also pared back many things I had previously considered needs and relegated them to 'maybe someday if I have time'. I cut back on the menu options I'd consider cooking to focus on easy, realized 'minute mental vacations' were going to have to suffice, and that the number one item on my daily list was always going to be caregiving and my wife's needs that day (or hour).

I'm happy to answer any questions you might have regarding specific suggestion areas!

Strength, Courage, & Peace