Thanks - I don’t have any family close but have some good friends here. I went to my hometown this past weekend and took some ashes with me to put at my families grave site. That helped a bit since he wanted to be buried there - with me. But the trip was bittersweet - saw some old friends but lots of sad moments, especially on the ride back.

I need to find things to do to keep busy and right now hate to spend time at home. Too many memories. I could use something to help me sleep but not really into taking drugs for fear of becoming dependent.

You’ve been struggling for five months - doesn’t seem to be getting easier. I want to have a celebration of his life, something that I know he’d enjoy. Have a hard time getting started to plan it, but don’t want to let too much time pass.

Praying that you’re better able to cope ... I appreciate that you shared your experience. It’s just not easy!