Catherine, we will be praying for you through the surgery and your treatments.

My wife was diagnosed at stage 3 in July 2019. She started with 9 cycles of Folfirinox, followed by SBRT (targeted raditation), modified Appleby procedure (everyone knows Whipple, no one knows Appleby except a few top specialists) and then recuperation for almost a year. Unfortuantely her recuperation was during covid and the isolation was heaped on top of the issues with recuperation. A new tumor was discovered in the ovary (skip metastasis) in February 21 and it was removed in March followed by Gemcitibine?Abraxane/Cisplaten. She just compelted her 12 scheduled treatment but now faces additional treatments until her numbers or scan put her in the clear.

I wish I could tell you that there won't be tremendous hurdles, but you have more support than we do. We have no children either and no nearby family and due to covid, even well intentioned friends haven't been able to do much. Everyone's journey is going to be different. My wife's has been extremely rough. Everything from ongoing eating/nutrition to chemo side effects to more side effects from the meds treating the side effects. Others we communicate with have a much easier time. Hopefully you will be on the easier path.

You are correct that this will be extremely difficult for your husband. Our marriage was always close to 50/50 as far as duties and responsibilities. Since her treatments began, it has been more like 95/5 and it is exhausting. But, I do it for her. I constantly remind myself not to complain because I am the healthy, strong partner and nothing that I have experienced is as difficult as what she has been facing.

Good luck and bless you and your family.

Hi Catherine, today is your surgery day, so I know you won’t be reading this yet. But I wanted you to know that we are thinking of you and Tom here on Mayo Clinic Connect. I hope you will find this message during your recovery and return to tell us how you’re doing.

Not sure of your age. I am 74 and had surgery in February of this year. A wonderful surgeon. We used a spinal block and I would definitely recommend that. It allowed me to get up and walk with less pain and thus out of the hospital in 5 days instead of the expected 7-8 or more. I pushed myself but didn't overdo anything. The spinal made the difference for me. I am now fighting disease progression in the liver as my tumor was rare genotype in 1-2 % only and I had 1 positive node that I think is the source of my metatasis even though my cancer was found early. I am fighting and my medical team is trying many options but we know it is a difficult fight. I too worry about my husband who has already said if I die, he will follow. We have two wonderful children and two grandchildren that need him. We are working on plans of how to keep him positive for his future even if mine is not. Would like to hear others thoughts.
Keep your head in a positive atmosphere, let your family and friends support you in whatever way. I love thee cards they send and positive vibes they pass along. Enjoy every day however you can. Cry if needed, scream and then go to the positive again. The BEST to you.