@loribmt I take the drink at night cause I love the peace and quiet. It keeps me awake for too long and when I get to sleep I find it very difficult to wake up mentally and physically. I could barely walk or see anything clearly for the first few hours of waking up, I'd have some palpitations, stomach aches and feeling very cold and weak. Well actually the weakness begins in my sleep as I sometimes groan in my sleep. I wake up very late too so my day is mostly over ruined, unproductive. I don't stay at home because of all thr judgy little eyes I'll be receiving from all around so I walk to a friend's. Walking there is a must so I do not think I made any efforts really cause I literally have no other choice. On getting to my friend's place I just plug in my laptop and play games till it's night and time to go back home. The cycle repeats and continues.
I'll look up your links anyway. Thanks a lot.
2 things I like about myself, weirdly I love that I'm this alone cause I wouldn't have to waste anyone's time and also I love that I have hope.

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