Good evening @marbee21, I am Chris and am currently and probably for the future in the very same position as you appear to find yourself. I am thinking that this may be a medical issue based on the way you have written the words. Our relationship is a relatively new one......about 8 years. Initially, we were like young lovers.......hardly able to wait until we arrived at his house or mine to begin an evening of lovemaking. All of a sudden, my life partner was diagnosed with prostate cancer and the next three years were a bit touch and go. First came surgery and then just as the physical issues were becoming less of a challenge, the cancer returned and the radiation treatments began.

As he says, even a partial erection can give him physical and emotional pleasure. And you are so right....sex is important in any relationship. I can remember thinking that it was just so much effort. Sometimes, I was ready to try assistance from prostheses among other options. And we stopped talking about it......just held each other and expressed our feelings with mutual manipulation.

To my surprise, I am the one who then encountered physical restraints as aging tissue became dry and painful to touch. At my annual physical we both had a chance to broach the subject with my PCP who was understanding.

We have also considered couple therapy. We both have backgrounds in counseling and therapy but not sex therapy. Surprisingly, we have grown closer than I ever thought possible after a year of lockdown. We can open new doors, have broadening conversations and often collapse in laughter at and with each other.

Would you consider talking with a professional about your relationship?

May you have happiness and the causes of happiness.
Chris